Mistakes Families Make That Lead to Poor Self-Esteem of the Members


They say the family is the best support system that anyone should ever have. If you have a loving, respectful, and supportive family, then kids and all members of the family can live a happier and healthier life. The problem is, many people can only wish for their family to be the same. More often than not, kids grow up in families that, instead of helping them be the best version of themselves, their families are the first ones to discourage them from reaching their full potential.

Although unintentional, some parents and other older members of the family would model habits and values that don’t help build confident and well-rounded kids. If you want the best for your family, then you must start building every member’s confidence early on. Are you also making the following mistakes that can potentially destroy your loved one’s confidence?


Parents should be the first ones to develop and maintain a great relationship with their kids. One should practice their active listening skills to ensure their kids know they are heard each time they have something to share. Parents should also take time to know about their kid’s interests and how they can support their children’s passion.

The problem is that, once their kids grow older, parents tend to withdraw from certain responsibilities. They would rather withdraw and avoid getting involved with their teens for as long as their children stay out of trouble. Others would simply provide for their kid’s needs and forget about supporting their children’s interests.

Know that parents’ disengagement won’t help in raising your kids to be confident young adults. Commit to staying involved in their lives and find ways to join and support them in their endeavors. Be their number one fan and support, and you can help build their confidence in the long run.

Forgetting About Your Own Self-care

For kids, their parents are their first role models. If you take self-care for granted, they will surely think that self-care is a luxury and not an actual need. If you want your kids to value themselves, be healthier, and feel more confident, show them how to practice self-care.

Self-care is not simply about mindful eating and working out daily. It is not just about getting an adequate amount of sleep and splurging on the right beauty products. This can also be about doing things that will make your life better and easier so you can have more time taking care of your needs and getting things done.

For instance, one of the things that make you feel beautiful the most is makeup. You can cut your makeup routine in half if you consider investing in permanent makeup options. By showing your kids that there are various ways to take care of themselves, you are basically letting them know that they have control over their bodies once they reach the right age.

This is not to say that you are expecting your kids to do the same and seek perfection. Remember that people have various reasons for getting their brows, lips, or cheeks done. Let your family know, especially the kids, that sometimes, people make decisions to change to save time and feel empowered.

Being Overprotective

mother talking to her tween

Many kids who lack confidence often have parents who are overprotective. It is only natural that you want your family to be away from harm and danger. But once you overdo it, you are already taking your kid’s chances of learning on their own away.

There is a big difference between keeping your kids safe and insulating them from challenges that can help them grow stronger and resilient. Practice safety without stopping your kids from falling and learning from their mistakes. Here are a few examples of how to stop being an overprotective parent:

  • Keep realistic goals and expectations
  • Teach kids the difference between risks and risky undertakings
  • Practice safety before letting your kids explore new activities
  • Focus on how you can support your kids
  • Teach them important life lessons
  • Stop controlling their every action and let them use their imagination
  • Stop obsessing but be honest about your fear
  • Introduce dangers and show them how to handle dangerous situations
  • Surround yourself with people who are not helicopter parents
  • Stop bailing your kids out every time they make mistakes
  • Let them choose their own friends
  • Give them choices
  • Respect their need for privacy
  • Support independence
  • Allow privileges and freedom according to their development

Raising confident kids can be tricky if you have never done this before. Even parents to many kids still make these mistakes. But if you want your kids to grow into resilient, happy, and confident adults, stop making the same mistakes. Be their best support and confidant, and you can even nurture your relationship with them no matter how old they get.

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